December 11, 2003

Halushki!

I swear I thought my Czech grandmother made this recipe up until I searched it up on google just now and found proof that it's a Polish/Slovak standard.

We make it a little different. We cut a head or two of cabbage up into thin strips, then put a MESS (that's like almost a stick) of butter in a pan, and sautee the cabbage until it starts to brown and carmelize. This takes a while, and it's an art to get the gas just right so the cabbage gets soft before browning.

While the cabbage is cooking, we boil noodles (shells preferred, so the little soft pieces of cabbage can stick all inside of the shells). We skip the onion. We use lots of salt. When the noodles and cabbage are done, we mix them together and add more salt (and butter if needed, and when is it not?).

Calories: 339,004,005
Sodium: 449,440,000
Taste: Priceless

From the land of scratching backs...

No surprise here. Bush&Cheney will make it all sound okay, and even if they don't, it won't matter because Bush fanatics, like Limbaugh fanatics, could have proof positive shoved up inside their noses, all the way to their sinuses, and they wouldn't buy it. The if-then-else programming is so deeply ingrained that their brains switch to autopilot when threatened with the truth.

see why i stay out of this political crap? it makes my head explode.



Alternative Medicine

If they run out of the batch of flu vaccine they're buying and importing from Europe, I think I'll take this version of the flu shot instead. I'm not sure it keeps you well, but I don't think you much care about having the flu either.

Holy PR, Batman

Check this site out for a slew of good PR links. Must spend some time digging into these.

I SO wish I had stock in Zicam.

Zicam works. And I think it's essential backup with killer viruses sweeping across the nation. I wish I had stock in this stuff. How do I get some? I'm a stock idiot. I have no idea.

Zicam works. I've said that since I first used it.

Get some.

I dunno. It's not the David I thought.

Was reading Dr. David's JOHO a few minutes ago, which I always search up via google by typing in "JOHO," because I always type joho.com (wrongly) and so google is how I get to david.

Anyway, I mistakenly (I guess) clicked on google images for JOHO.

I don't know. There are a bunch of men depicted in images entitled joho.gif, and yet, none of them look like the david weinberger I saw at Publix a month or so ago. Unless he looks very different in swim trunks.

Hmmm. I'm ready for a blog version of What's My Line to find out who the real Sir JOHO is.

Slippers and Parkas

For the first time since we moved to the south, I got bedroom slippers this winter. I've never been a slipper wearer or a robe wearer, and I don't know if it's that I'm older now or just plain Southern, but I can't take this cold. Today I found myself nostalgic for a parka, you know the kind with a hood and the fuzzy fake fur around your face? Yes. Mmmmmm. Warm.

The heating bill's gonna be crazy next month. 75 degrees and counting.

Remember how they owed me money?

Well, they still due [sic]. Two invoices past 60 days, three past 30. Things are getting tight. Again.

Ho Ho Ho,
might as well
become a
Ho.

empty houses are creepy in the winter

Three empty houses on our street. Two forclosures, one unassed. And I hear the economy's getting better.

Yah, okay.

School Germinitis

PTA meeting tonight, which meant 200 or so parents and at least as many kids running crazy through the school, and what is that, 2,000 kid fingers touching, rubbing, grabing, flushing? Oh geez. Time to go disinfect mother and daughter. I already have a headache.

I'm not loving my 40s.

Mosly they've been a pain.

What do you want me to tell him?

So, I'm meeting with this really neat potential client tomorrow who wants to know more about blogging, maybe jump into it. What do you want me to tell him--i.e. what's your one piece of advice to heads of business looking to blog?

I say:

1) Don't do it like this guy.

2) Don't blog from your business card title--blog from your gut and interests and conversation will follow.

3) Be prepared to get pissed off at the medium about every 7-10 days.

4) Take care with your blogroll.

5) Visit here often for cool shit you can use.

Those are the top five things off the top of my head. And you?


who dat girl?



Halley, Is that you behind Dean? Hey, I know you were up there rubbing elbows, but I didn't expect to see your black teddy make the national news.

;-)

December 10, 2003

luxurious interuptus

This evening Jenna had a baby sitter at our house for the first time ever. Yes, that's right. I had the evening to go to therapy and not worry about where she'd be or if my sister would be feeling up to watching her (she just had surgery, so her recovery will take some time) or if my friend who swaps watching the kids with me was over the flu yet.

I was so excited after group to have the luxury of taking an hour just for me. Not rushing home. I was going to go to a store or two, maybe stop at the mall, something. But the worried mother in me wouldn't let it happen. I called home and continued to get the message that someone was on the phone.

So of course, I'm thinking, "WHY is this baby sitter on the phone--she should be watching my kid!" And I call every five minutes all the way home, forgetting about shopping, nagging at myself about the many failures of human beings, only to walk in the front door and find them sitting blissfully playing with stickers in the living room when I got home.

Apparently, Jenna called my cellphone with the cordless phone, which ran out of batteries while she was dialing, which made the "on the phone" message come on since the receiver was never really hung up.

All of this is to say, I raced home for no reason.

I'll chalk this up as a practice run I guess.

Maybe next time... Maybe next time...

Sue Whitey

Were Principal McCracker and the local police wrong?

You bet they were. I imagine this conversation taking place between the Principal and the chief of police the week before the raid:

"Hi. McCracker here. You ready?"

"Yep, we're ready to teach those kind a lesson. If they think they're bringing drugs, rap and jungle love into our schools, we've got a biiig surprise for them. Hey, you got those first floor utility closets cleaned out? I want to hide a few men in there--jump out, pull our guns, and scare the pants off their black asses."

"Yes Chief, the school's ready. Now, all the busses from the ghetto get here at 6:45. So get here early. The good kids don't get here until after 7. Now, I don't want a hair harmed on a single blonde head in this place--you understand that, right?"

"Of course! We all know what the dope dealers look like. As long as it's light enough out, we'll be able to see them--A HA HA HA HA--get it McCracker?"

"Good one. Heh. Yah, well, if you pull your guns, you'll be able to see the whites of their eyes get REAL big! HA! Bring some of your drug sniffing dogs with you--okay? I mean, I know you won't find any drugs, but you know how they h-a-t-e dogs, eh? HA HA HA!"

"You got it. Okay. We'll be kicking some young black ass. It'll be a proud day. A proud day."


If a cop pulled a gun on my kid at school because of some lamebrained principal's inability to run the place, you better believe I'd sue. Sue, sue, sue. Either that or kick some serious behind. I'd show that McCracker black. Yah.... Black and blue.

Al Sharpton has a point, but it's 404.

"I know that Governor Dean and Al Gore love the Internet; www.bossism doesn't work on my computer." -- Al Sharpton

Um, that's because you forgot the .com, Mr. Sharpton.

Actually, www.bossism.com does work. Or as we say on the Internet, that domain is taken.

Fortunately for you though Al, bossism.org and .net are still available--Act Now! Send me $500,440 and I'll register them *both* for you! That's a huge savings!

And I expect a link.

biceps, triceps, and....

Bedtime with jenna, it's always wonderous to watch her mind wind down. Laying there last night, the questions came, as usual:

"What's this muscle called again?" she asked pointing to the under side of her upper arm.

"Tricep?" I answered, having no idea if that was right.

"And this--this is bicep," she said, pointing to her bicep, then down to her tummy: "Abs," then the back of her leg: "Hamstring."

"Yep, I think that's right."

"HAMSTRING!" She said starting to laugh uncontrollably. "HAM STRING!"

She got me giggling.

"You know what I see when I say HAM STRING mommy? I see a ham, you know, with the white lines running through it, and he's got peach arms and long legs, and he's wearing light blue socks and dark blue sneakers, HA HA, and he's got his socks turned down like my school socks, and he's walking on a string, like this, like a typerope, HA HA, and the string is white, you know, with those black stripes that go round and round, and the ham is like WHOA! trying to walk on the string!"

"Yep, I see him too, baby"

"HA HAAAH AHAHAAA! HAM STRING. Get it? Ham on a string!"

Can't help but laugh.

December 09, 2003

Mmmmmmmmmmmmm good

feeling icky still or again--can't tell. Just downed a can of Campbell Select Italian Style Wedding Soup (couldn't find it in those cute microwave bowls). I want to tell you, right up there with my Sicilian grandmother's homemade sauce and meatballs is her chicken soup.

Growing up, we never knew it had a name. Maybe it wasn't a brand 40 years ago. We said it like this: "Grandma, can you make your chicken soup with the little meatballs in it?" My brother called it meatball soup. Oh. It was so good.

Anyway, I just had Campbell Select's version, and you know what? It's pretty darn good. Sprinkle some pecorino romano cheese on top, and you're half way home.

December 08, 2003

Dave on Technology and Politics--AKA, Huh?

"I insisted that politics and technology were inseparable. Hey it's nice to be right."
--Dave Winer

Never has a space after a period begged for more proof.

Technology works best sans politics, actually. Because technology at its best is innovation. Politics kills innovation.

In fact I thought that the best thing about blogging way back when was the obvious lack of politics. The absence of a formal hierarchy. The natural, inherent sideways linkage. It was magnificent. The days when no one really knew how many hits they were getting, much less cared.

As for whether technology can be removed from politics? I don't much care. Politics may move faster, fly higher, or swerve better because of technology, but you can still smell the nasty fumes all the way to the winner's circle.

Shots done

Add Hep A (there's an outbreak in GA) to the flu shot number two and call it a day.

she's shotted. I'm shot.

eeeeeee.

Who's Getting Flu Shots, Who's Not?

Jenna goes for flu shot number 2 today. Apparently if you're under 9 years of age and have never had a flu shot before, you gotta get two. I haven't told her yet. I get to pick her up at school and break the news on the way over to the doctor's. Poor kid has had 10 shots since mid-september. She didn't have a needle phobia before, but she's building up a good one now.

I have the magic cream ready. Parents if you don't know about it, ask your pediatrician to prescribe some before your child goes for their next vaccines. It's a numbing cream that you spread on and cover with a big bubble bandage, let it sit for 30 minutes, and the shot is perfectly ouchless. What an invention!

Magic Cream--ask for it by name. It's not the name at all, but that's what all the hospitals and pediatricians call it.

Unfortunately, Jenna needs only to see the magic cream now to set her shot panic into motion. Kind of defeats the purpose, but it really does work. Afterwards she says, "Was that it? Is it over? That didn't hurt at all!" Wish she'd realized that before kicking the nurses and pinching the flesh off my neck.

This is her first ever flu shot, but with the stories coming out of the southwest, and how sick she's been this year, we opted to vaccinate her vs. the flu. They are saying it offers cross protection even though this year's strain is not the strain they're vaccinating against.

Any adults out there getting the shot? I never have. Should we or shouldn't we? Only the virus knows for sure. Hurry up spring!

December 07, 2003

eminem and the pres.

"In the song, the rapper declares he would not perform only for cash: "I don't rap for dead presidents," Eminem says. "I'd rather see the president dead. It's never been said, but I set precedents and the standards, and they can't stand it!"

I dunno. I don't see anything particularly threatening about these lyrics. Dead presidents refers to money. Eminem's saying that he'd rather see the president dead before he'd rap for money (dead presidents). That's kind of like saying I'd rather have tacks stapled in my toes before I'd work in BigPR again.

Then, of course, he's using the universal (cough) "I" to represent the power of music and art (and, say, blogging) -- the anti-institution stuff -- to set the real standards and precedents of our culture and nation. And that said insitutions, government mainly, can't stand that art is more potent than institution.

At least, that's what I'd argue if I were him and the secret service came a knockin'.

Man, whatever happened to poetic license.

P.S.-- Great PR move by Eminem.

what to do

So what do you do when you have a three-day weekend solo parenting a kid with a nasty GI bug, one who's still well enough to be bored silly but not well enough to go running about having fun?

If you're me, you carefully plan a 30-minute trip to Joann's, timing the run (no pun intended) intricately two minutes after bathroom dash number 23, and 28 minutes before bathroom dash number 24, then you speed through sidestreets to the store, at which time you fill your basked with one box making kit, one embroidery kit, enough colored boondoggle strands to wind around the block twice, and a pack of twist-up crayons, then you speed home just in time.

You're feeling like a professional parent who's ready to rock and roll with the craft projects.

Then you realize you completely forgot how to do a square knot, and that without such knowledge boondoggle making is virtually impossible. Oh well, you think, we'll put beads on the strands instead, and you do, and it looks way cool.

And you have great fun embroidering with your sick child as you put the last roll of toilet paper on the holder realizing there was one more thing you should have gotten while you were out.

Life is such a crazy fun thing. What would we do without it?

Holy Holiday Spam, Batman

I can't tell my good emails from my spam anymore. HAPPY HOLIDAYS GET A BIGGER ____! Listen, if you email me, put blogger or something in the subject line because it seems that EVERYONE who's NO ONE wants to email me this holiday season offering:

a bigger johnson
lesbian love
prescriptions that Rush would love to get his felon hands on
some awesome paris footage
tips for satisfying my woman
a cure for my pain and stiffness
discount registrations
and a lot of just plain HI!s

So, let's make a blogger pact and find some relevant word to use in the subject of our emails that will help us all tell our asses from a hole in the wall.